Entah kenapa orang yang kita sayang selalu pergi meninggalkan kita,Entah kenapa orang yang kita harapkan selalu hampakan kita,Entah kenapa orang berpura -pura mengatakan sayang dekat kita tetapi itu semua dusta semata -mata.Entah kenapa hati ini tidak berair mata lagi?Mungkin hati ini kering dan tidak bernyawa lagi?Adakah dikau yang merampas nyawa dari hati ini?
Mataku sakit, telingaku perit, otakku serabut,perutku mual, perasaanku jijik melihat kau bersama si dia,bersekongkol dengan si dia, menyokong si dia, menyebarkan yang salah dan membutakan yang benar.Bodohkah dikau?Butakah dikau?Pekakkah dikau?Tulikah dikau?Bebalkah dikau?Tidakkah dikau lihat?Tidakkah di kau nampak dengan mata hatimu bahawa hati ini ada untuk engkau?
TIDAK!! kau tidak nampak itu semua.Suara sumbang menjadi panduan dan penunjuk arahmu.Mereka yang hina itulah sahabatmu, dan mereka yang menyesatkan itulah karibmu.Kering~kering hati ini tidak bernyawa kerana di kau!!Perasaan mereka dikau agungkan, perasaan mereka dikau pentingkan,perasaan dia dikau sanjungkan,bagaimana dengan aku?bagaimana dengan engkau?
Rumit semua perkara dibawa oleh mereka,mereka yang merumitkan keadaan,mereka yang dijadikan panduan, mereka yang diagungkan,mereka,mereka,mereka bukan kita.Entah, entah, entah…entah berapa kali ku cuba membohong hati ini,entah berapa kali aku cuba untuk membaluti luka ini,entah berapa kali ku cuba menahan rekahan di hati yang sedang kering…dikau bahawa segalanya cuba menjahanamkan ia , di tikamnya di depan depan..Mengapa?
Apabila ku melihat musuh di depan mata, ku harap akan adanya dikau di belakang, tetapi di manakah dikau berada?kau berada di dalam kelompok musuhku , di depan aku, bersekongkol dengan mereka, membuat onar dan kacau,menyerabutkan jiwa, membunuh nyawa.
Engkau lah ratu, engkau lah puteri, engkau lah si pencuri hati,
engkau lah engkau, seluruh dunia, engkau lah engkau, pembunuh nyawa~
Ironic isn’t it?The one you love always be the one that hurt you the most.The one that you care about always end up hurting your own feeling.In relationship either it can be between couples or among friends, the one that you care about is the one that make you suffer.People always said that, everything happen for a reason even we might not know what the reason really is.
Feeling is a very complicated things.We cant force ourselves to be happy or sad, we can only pretend that we do.The downside is the act of pretending has certain limit.People that hurt your feeling is different when the one you love acting the same way.The act is completely different and the impact is also different.
Once when a friend said, Love’s hurt.I don’t believe it at all.How come it could be hurtful when you’re with someone you love and adore?Telling me a bull are you?Seems like he was right anyway,and sometimes the pain is unbearable beyond i have even imagined.
I always good at fixing things.I always have.Back in the days, my friends often ask my opinion when they have difficulties and i every, almost every time i manage to solve the problem.Seems like i the ability has abandon me at last.I’m in a ruined and i really frightened me when i realise that i have to face it alone without no one.Loneliness,maybe that is the thing that everybody tried to avoid after they finally found someone.
I thought i could managed it like before, but maybe i was wronged all along.I could if i stay the same way like before not until i have met someone.Someone that make me realize that i also have a heart.The simple creation yet have many functions.I hope i can get through this trouble time with ease.That is all i have left, HOPE.
I’m really piss.Why are you doing this to me?she was a big fat liar.Telling me to stay put and wait for her.Do you think I’m stupid enough to be played like that?I was wondering if i really have waited for you, i don’t even think that you will show up…Upon my arrival, i saw you are laughing madly with those $#%^$%^.What?You think you fool me?Calling me to eat the same table with all of them?After what you do to me?Hell!!!!! I’m pissed off!!!I don’t know what is wrong with you lately.Asking for trouble, made up trouble, is making me suffer your hobby?You got nothing better to do right?You have change so much till i don’ even know know who are you anymore.Liar!!!!Liar!!!!Liar!!!!With your butt still sitting on that very the same chair, i could n’t believe you would actually have the ability to lie msg me every minutes with “otw” that’s on the way for those who did n’t know. In order to convince me that you are on your way whereas you never move on the very same spot.What is your problem?
Sorry guys, i know it’s been a while since i write anything.Been busy lately with all the work and stuff.I already finish downloading Hikaru no Go full episode and currently watching non stop till 65 episode right now (75 in total).Been downloading lots of stuff hehehe…Thank you to the internet that has given the opportunity to download as my heart desire.
I just finished downloading COD 2, i know, i know old school right but there won’t be the COD 4 and % if they didn’t come up with 2 first dont they?Capt’n Price in in COD 2 , still young huh Capt’n?I also finished downloading romance of the three kingdom 11 ( well save a rm 12 there, dah nak beli dah kat kedai aritu nasib baik jumpe source)hehe.Waiting to finish downloading the Sims 3 im half way through.
Watch a couple of new movie and old one.The star trek, night at the museum 2, angel and demon well if you know where to get those you really can save lots of money.I rarely went out nowadays, only to hangout a couple of times at Starbuck for my caramel afogato and play bowling.The project for Menghilir Sungai Pahang is already completed, well people those who lived in Kuantan go and see the Bilboard near komplek Teruntum.Hehehe perlu la nak bangga kan?
I not looking forward to go back to the u at the moment.For me, i find it a waste of time that i have to go back too KL just to play bowling…Since im been doing the same thing here.It’s not its getting to my head or something, but why would i spend my time playing bowling 2 hours everyday (as if) in KL if i can do it in Kuantan?besides we dont have any coach mind you.Aduyai i hate to go back, i learnt recently that not all of the bowler will be there for the training session.I really dont like the ideas though by having to go back to KL earlier than everyone else.if it was up to me, i want to go to the venue day, win the damn tournament and went back home.Its not like a SUKMA preparation or the interstate tournament.
Hurm i have few invitation to wedding ceremony this JUNE and i can’t go.Aduyai…hurm, today is Sunday already and i will be back in KL 2 weeks from now.It’s not like i despise living in KL, only i miss being here in Kuantan.Even without doing nothing you can enjoy the peace enviroment that kuantan can offer.I havent go to the TC yet.The monkey must be missing me hahaha.
There are two other anime that im downloading right now the Samurai Deeper Kyo and the Gundam.Let me tell you a bit about Hikaru no Go.
While exploring his grandfather’s shed, Hikaru stumbles across a Go board haunted by the spirit of Fujiwara-no-Sai, a fictional Go player from the Heian era. Sai wishes to play Go again, having not been able to since the late Edo period, when his ghost appeared to Honinbō Shūsaku, an actual Go player of that period. Sai’s greatest desire is to attain the – “Divine Move”, or the “Hand of God” – a perfect game. Because Hikaru is apparently the only person who can perceive him, Sai inhabits a part of Hikaru’s mind as a separate personality, coexisting, although not always comfortably, with the child.
Urged by Sai, Hikaru begins playing Go despite an initial lack of interest in the game. He begins by mimicking the moves Sai dictates to him, but Sai tells him to try to understand each move. In a Go salon, Hikaru defeats Akira Toya twice, a boy his age who plays Go at professional level, by following Sai’s instruction. Akira subsequently begins a quest to discover the source of Hikaru’s strength, an obsession which will come to dominate his life.
Hikaru becomes intrigued by the great dedication of Akira and Sai to the game and decides to start playing solely on his own. He is a complete novice at first, but has some unique abilities to his advantage; for instance, once he has a basic understanding of Go, he can reconstruct a game play by play from memory. Through training at Go clubs, study groups, and practice games with Sai, he manages to become an insei and later a pro, meeting various dedicated Go players of different ages and styles along the way. While Hikaru is at this point not yet up to the level of Akira, he demonstrates a natural talent for the game and remains determined to prove his own abilities to Akira, Sai, and himself.
The anime is one of the best anime i have seen.The world of Go is very interesting although im having the difficulties to compare between Othello an Go at first.There’s a tutorial at the end of every episode where they explain about Go.Hurm seems like i will be finish the series soon.If anyone of you are interested, i could lend it to you or you could just download the anime hehehe….
Let’s end today posting with and old videoclip from the JinxCrew member (Welcome to the Black PArade) hehehe if i’m not mistaken, it was made 3 years back.So enjoy and drop a comment yar?
There are saying ” Cintailah seseorang itu dengan berpada – pada kerana mungkin satu hari nanti anda akan membencinya dan bencilah seseorang it dengan berpada – pada kerana mungkin satu hari nanti anda akan mencintainya”.Well, do you believe in this phrase?Part of me want to believe it, but another part said other wise.
Let face it, there is no such things as ” Puaskan hati semua orang”, and if somebody manage to find the way, do contact me and explain briefly.Certain people has gift or charm which no matter what they do, people still like them.However, on the other side, there are some type of people who can satisfied others in every single thing that they do.Do you ever hate some one?If you don’t, then kudos to you…
We hate people for many reason.They hurt us physically or mental.They do horrible thing to us.However,we could only hate them because of jealousy or because we envy them.Hurm, human, never satisfied don’t they.Well aren’t we all just like that.That’s why there’s a word that you need to study.”Syukur”..
People just hate seeing others happy and they try to destroy that happiness with any valid reason.Seeing others happy is so painful to them since they might not get the same treatment , or they are neglected by their surrounding.They will do everything in their power to influence those around them to act and behave the way they want it.If they are unhappy, others can’t have it too.
I know someone who possess these behavior (should i refer she/he as someone since i already called them nonhuman hehehe)…However her skill in persuading others is legendary.With her tears and sad face more resemblance to pig face if you must say..could capture those fool’s heart and mind..I don’t blame them, she maybe use some kind of black magic in order to do that.For those who is very fortunate is not in this sick animal’s cycle of life.I envy you, cause i know it will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Based on my word, you could detect that there’s a little hatred in it.No~ lot’s of hatred in it you might say.For some people, when they thought everything was quite, it was the end of the journey.OH NO, they are wrong, it;s not the end, it’s only a calm phase before the big tide coming.So better prepare before the tide was unleashed.Even the big wave will swap away you’re stupid tears of drama queen.Tears don’t work for me,anymore.
Guys, it’s not a good idea to keep hatred in your heart, but you will be foolish to just let it go.When the time’s come, it need to settle.Thing’s undone,need to be settle..this i ensure you.Before im writing anymore nonsense,it’s better if i hit the bed hehehehe.
